What's Bothering You?

There's no hot water because the boiler has been losing pressure and whilst an appointment has been booked to fix it I can't re-pressurise the boiler myself as its in the loft and my mum has gone to get her second dose of the vaccine. Happy Saturday everyone! 🙄
 
i have a little crush on a new guy at work. of course he just started working there after i put my two weeks in. i only get to work one shift with him before my last day, which is disappointing. i wish i had been able to talk to him more
 
All month I've been super stressed and when I come online it doesn't do any good and I had to take a week off from this site and I came back feeling numb but not fully better. My emotions are all over the place and I don't know what to think anymore.
 
I hate when I have work days where I feel like I have to be spoon-fed instructions constantly on what to do next cause I'm stressed, overwhelmed or my brain just decides to not work.

I already know I'm stupid in more ways than one, but I don't need to let others (irl people) know that
lol you're not the only one, this is literally me at work as well 😩 I'm always asking what feels like stupid questions and my workmates/managers must think I'm the big dumb™️. I'm pretty thick at the best of times too, but I want my colleagues to think that I at least have a brain lol
 
Ugh, I can't really sleep. Something is bothering me a bit tonight. It's been on my mind for awhile -- perhaps someday I'll say it to them in person about how I feel about it. Just making things clear and being honest. I know they care about me a lot. I mean, they've done so much and truly want me to succeed and has helped me in any way they can, but I need to tell them this one day when we meet again in person. I'm not really a very open person when it comes to personal matters, or at least when I'm not online. I always tend to beat around the bush, and it hurts me in the end. I'll just come clean.
 
Can't shake the feeling of being trapped / responsible for everything. Ugh. Can somebody else just take over and make decisions / clean my house?
And my son might be getting sick and is having trouble learning some basic skills and doesn't want to be around me anymore. ☹
And why am I awake at 6am? Because somebody finally got to bed after a gaming spree and is going to leave me alone to do everything AGAIN. EVERY WEEKEND, SAME STRUGGLE. AGHHHHHH.
 
This week I have to talk to my psychiatrist and counselor. I like my counselor but my psychiatrist, I hate him. I tried telling him about that friend and the incident from 3 years, 3 years ago and instead of providing anything constructive he said that is not good and yet he has the nerve to still try to force me to talk. and then he takes a a month to do something my mom asked him to do for the company that i’m receiving medicine from. we both know i should get a new psychiatrist but right now is not a good time especially since i’m moving in a year 😡 which i am still 🤬 about.
 
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