I am so frustrated, oh my goodness. I'm editing this just so I don't have to make a new post.
I love my dad, I really do, but God. He doesn't hear me when I tell him things. I don't know if it's because I'm his kid or if it's specifically because I'm his daughter (he can be quite sexist so I wouldn't be surprised if my gender has something to do with it) but I'm so tired of him not listening. I'll tell him things and he'll brush it off or tell me I'm mistaken because, "that's just not how things are," as if I don't know anything.
Then he goes out to see his friend (he wasn't visiting socially - his friend runs a garage and our van needs repairs) and his friend tells him literally the same things I've been saying and suddenly they're all facts! Houses are expensive, the conservatives are cutting social assistance programs, rent is sky rocketing so no dad, we can't just move because you don't like the neighbourhood.
When I say those things it's, "no, no. We lived at X years ago and it wasn't that bad," I even pulled up a damn listing and read him the price and he was like, "oh well, everything must be included in that price!" and when I said it wasn't it's that I was reading the listing wrong or misunderstanding something, or that no, the conservatives aren't cutting funding to "deserving" people they're just "weeding out the bad ones". It drives me absolutely crazy. I hate arguing with him and I know things are extra stressful right now with some things going on but I just feel like I'm going to scream.
Everything feels so pointless. Rent is expensive, housing is expensive, school is expensive and I was absolutely miserable when I was in high school so going back feels daunting, even if I do graduate with my intended degree I won't be going into a well paying career because I'm not smart enough for a fancy job. I'm caught between trying to move out and see what happens - but that means I'll be leaving my dad alone, when he can't afford it nor is he completely capable of living alone due to his disability, or... just staying with him for what feels like forever. Idk. Just a lot of thoughts in my head and I'm miserable tonight.