Noo noo, never say that! You are more important to people than you realize! I totally understand how you feel about medical bills, and hating everything, I really do. I'm so sorry you feel this way. Please feel free to PM me, okay? Call your medical facility's billing department - most, if not all of them have a payment plan option. Totally take advantage of those. Insurance is finicky - it always feels as though it's not worth it until you meet your deductible, but the amount needed to meet it is insane.
Last year, I had a surgery that just the surgery alone cost $125,000 but with all the other appointments associated with it, it was probably $200,000. I paid ZERO out of pocket, because I'd met my deductible already. Crazyyy!
Edit: my concept of time has eluded me. It was 2 years ago lol